Gone Too Young

Isaiah 57:1-2
"Good people pass away; the godly often die before their time. But no one seems to care or wonder why.No one seems to understand that God is protecting them from the evil to come. For those who follow godly paths will rest in peace when they die."

During my quiet time I read Isaiah 57:1-2 and immediately my thoughts drifted into the past. My eyes enveloped with tears as I began to think about my Aunt Paula and my mother in law, Julia.  They were two women that left this world far too early.

Thinking about my Aunt Paula, she was such a radiant soul. She held a spirit of love and courage. I recall weekends with her-the feel of her fingers as she combed my hair into pony tails-sometimes so tight my vision was blurred,but I still felt the tenderness of her heart. It was how she made me feel. The aura of her presence is unforgettable. Sitting next to her in their one cab truck felt safe (apparently in her care I was lost twice)-I knew deep down in my heart-I was in the best care. Funny, I don't remember her cooking, I don't remember her ever buying me anything extravagant-ever in my life. I have only a couple of material items that once were her possessions or gifts she gave me. My first Christmas, as a married woman, she gave me plates, a box of old recipes that I found hidden in her cabinet, a blanket and a doll-that she gave me as a child. All these pieces have no cash value, but they have more value to me than money could ever buy.  They hold memories to a woman that took the time to love me with all heart and soul.

The doll my Aunt Paula gave me!

When I first married my husband, I was intimated by my mother in law.  What I saw then was a strong, capable woman and I was this incapable girl taking her son.  I couldn't live up to her standards-I wasn't her.  I would never make her happy. 

What I couldn't see then was that she had never asked me to be her.  She had never asked me to live up to her standards.  She had never told me I was incapable.  I had made up so many stories in my head-I had just looked up to her in so many ways.  I just wanted to be like her-I wanted in so many ways to make her proud and could never tell her.  I believe today that all she wanted from me was to love her son-to take care of her grandchildren. Have I let her down-I'm sure I have-in fact-I know I have.  But, she too was such a loving, beautiful soul and forgiving in nature. 

My life is forever changed because of the impact of these two women.  My kids don't have the benefit of experiencing the love that radiated from both of these spirits. If I want to honor their memories- I need to do so by beaming the same love they gave to me and others. 

My mother in law, Julia!